29 December 2003 XXVI

Khamsin Molossia News

Trials of the Opposition. Every strong government has an opposition party, some tolerate theirs, others don't. Here in Molossia, we tolerate the opposition, but just barely. The opposition party is the Marksist Freedom Party, and has just one member: Mark. Of course in a small nation such as ours, one member is a large portion of the population, and this opposition party has managed to make life interesting for the loyal citizens of Molossia for some while now. A key note was the anarchistic bomb plot against a local school some years ago. Of late, however, the opposition has dealt itself some setbacks. Recently the lone Marksist obtained the privilege of driving by the government over the border in the US. In short order, said revolutionary obtained not one, not two, but three traffic tickets, two in one day. The result of this has been the suspension of driving privileges until May of 2005, as well as time in a detention facility as a guest of the US Government, and several days assignment to a work crew. These setbacks have only increased the belligerence of the opposition against the government of our great nation. In turn it has also dimmed the prospect of our own freedom from the troubles caused by the opposition, as liberation (exile) has now become a more distant prospect.

A White Christmas - Almost. Well, the weather outside is frightful, but it almost wasn't on Christmas. There is but one day a year when Molossians want snow, and the day is Christmas. And the weatherman, from the TV station over the border in the US, promised snow for Christmas. In the opinion of His Excellency, the President, being a weatherman is the best job in the world - the only one where you can be repeatedly wrong, in a public a venue, and still keep your job. This time, however, the weatherman was only partly wrong. It did snow on Christmas, but only at the end of the day, starting at about 9:00 PM MST. So we got our white Christmas. Sort of.

National Aquarium Debuts. The Government is proud to announce the debut of its latest attraction, the National Aquarium. In Molossian style, it is largely bereft of water, being a home for three Hermit Crabs. The crabs have been named Groucho, Harpo and Claw, by our youngest citizen. Plans have been made for an expansion, to allow for the addition of Desert Horned Toads in the future.

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