11 September 2007 XXX

Khamsin Molossia News

Whither the Horses?

The national animal of Molossia is the Wild Horse, or mustang, feral equines that roam the hills of northern Nevada. Large herds could frequently be seen grazing on grasses, wandering the back roads and running through the valleys around our nation. But over the past few years the number of wild horses has dwindled dramatically. In the early years that our nation was here in Northern Nevada, mustangs would congregate in Molossia, nibbling on our flora before wandering on to other locales. Gradually the herds became smaller and smaller, until finally they vanished completely. The rapid influx of immigrants to this area from California meant more lawns, and therefore more complaints about the horses eating the lawns. Increased traffic meant more cars hitting the horses, usually to the detriment of both. Local, state and federal authorities responded by capturing the beasts and sending them off to concentration camps. There they wait for adoptions that never happen, and eventually for French food companies to turn them into someone's dinner.

However, of late, a tiny herd has been seen back in our local area. Just three wild horses, a tiny group, but a welcome sight nevertheless. They have been spotted twice, not far from, but not in, Molossia. They have since proved elusive, but are still in the area according to local reports.

We are quite excited by the reappearance of our wild horses. They are a source of great pride and a symbol not only of our nation, but of the west, representing freedom and strength. We hope that they will continue to be a presence around Molossia for many years to come.

Hugo Plagiarizes

Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez has declared that his country will change times zones to a half-hour offset time zone, to take effect either this month or in January (reports are sketchy). The new time zone is based on the 66.5W line of longitude and will place Venezuela 4.5 hours behind Coordinated Universal Time. Molossia, of course, already had this idea, instigated by our President a couple of years ago. Molossian Standard Time is between Mountain and Pacific times, being 47 minutes ahead of Pacific Time and 13 minutes behind Mountain time. We established this separate time zone to demonstrate our uniqueness as a nation. Apparently President Chavez has loftier goals, such as allowing his people an extra hour of sunlight in the evenings, whether or not the sun agrees. It is the opinion of most Molossians that President Chavez has "borrowed" the separate time zone idea from our inspired President. Whether or not he did, it is certainly is an unusual idea - but it was our idea first!

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